Vacation Gratitude

I got home last night from our annual beach vacation very tired and very grateful.  As I sat with my notebook this morning, I realize how many blessings I experienced in this week.

First, there were the people.  We went as three houses - Kacey and Marnie and their family in one, my niece Gillian, her boyfriend Mitch and her dog in another and Audrey, me, my brother Geoff and Vicky and Dawn and Jason in another.  So, we were family and friends and inter generational and interacting at the beach, at meals, shopping, and playing games.  It was never boring and there was always someone to be with.

And then there is the beach.  We went to OBX which I first visited with my family 55 years ago.  To say that there are memories is an understatement.  My last time here was two years ago when Chuck and I stayed with Geoff and Vicky.  It was a fun trip and I especially remember celebrating the eclipse together  but it was also a hard trip for Chuck.  He could not make it to the ocean with all the steps up and down.  But I could then and I still can.  I spent more time in the ocean and at the beach than I have in years and it was both exhilarating and peaceful.  I sit and look at teenage granddaughters and remember being a teenager myself on the beach as well as being the MOM who brought teens to the beach.  It is like a telescope of memories and activities.  I still love to swim in the ocean and this year the weather cooperated and the waves were just right!  I sit here tanned and happy just thinking about it.

And then there were the ashes.  We brought Chuck's ashes and Wendesday night had a teary ritual where we each participated in digging a trough and then each of us placing some ashes in it.  We covered it over and then trusted that the waves would take him back into the sea.  Chuck did not want to be "laid to rest" in the ground and he was able to be free in the water where he liked to cruise and fish.  It was good and one more step along this journey of grief.

And then there were the games.  We do not get together without  playing lots of games and so - darts, pool, pounce, carcassone, sky jo, rummy, splendor, pit.  The list is endless and it was nothing but fun.

And finally - and always  -  there is the love.  For me, sitting in reflection after a time like this, helps me to savor all the ways that we all show love to each other.  It is in listening, in working, in walking, in cooking, in eating, in just taking a week to be Together.  Just valuing each other enough to spend time together is precious.

Here is one of the greatest gifts I was given.  The first evening at dinner along the way, Alyse got out her phone and said to me (after one of my great "life lessons") "Would you give me a life lesson every day and I will write it down?"  It was a joke for the week as I came up with pithy sayings that she dutifully wrote down.  And I loved it.  Here are the ones I remember

1. You can't see yourself.
2. Everyone wants to be seen
3. You can;t have enough cheese
4. Life is change
5. Whatever you put out into the universe is what you get back.

This last one is a variation on my theme song for the week - When You're Smiling.  Because I have definitely found that to be true.  It was a week of a lot of smiles and some tears (remembering Chuck) and making some new memories in a place that holds my heart.