Thursday, February 8, 2024

Pink Sky




John called to me from the back porch.  "Come and see" he said.

I looked up from working on "Spelling Bee" and listening to Morning Joe.  I put down the I pad and went to where he was.  And looked.  The sky was glorious.  It was pink and mirrored in the water.  I took pictures and just stood and looked at this beautiful sight.

What I know to be true is that there is so much beauty and wonder that I miss.  I live in a morning routine like most people.  Coffee, puzzles, tv and eventually I do come to a morning devotional practice.  That is good, but still - there is so much I miss.  

I take pictures and they never capture what it looks like.  It is a pathetic attempt to try to capture what is transient.  Because that pink sky lasted for about 15 minutes and then it was gone.

This is a trite thought, but I still write it this morning.  Nothing lasts - not the good, not the bad.

This is the last year that my grandson Jackson is in high school.  This spring is the last time we will go to see him run.  There is a sweetness to gathering in the fall or the spring with the whole family - with Jackson's parents, Kacey and Brett and the other grandparents and his aunts and uncles and cousins to watch him.  We have watched him play soccer, and run cross country and run track.  I have missed many opportunities usually because of my schedule.  It is all coming to an end. and in June there will be a big party to celebrate the completion of this milestone.  It seems like it was only 15 minutes ago that he was a little boy running around.  He soon will join the three granddaughters who are all in college and truly young adults.  Nothing lasts.  

So, I sit here today in gratitude for my new husband who helps me to put down the things that distract me from seeing the beauty that surrounds me.  So, that I can live in appreciation and gratitude for this moment of wonder.


Wednesday, January 31, 2024

Church Life

Today our church has only one worship service.  Afterwards there will be a congregational meeting where we will vote on the budget.

It is interesting now to be attending a church with John who has been throughout his adult life "unchurched."  So I find myself explaining things to him as if he is coming in from a foreign country.  The churches I served and the church I go to have a very transparent process.  We see how much money comes in and and where it goes.  I imagine I will learn today that the majority of the budget goes to salaries. and building maintenance.  It did in the churches that I served. And the money is coming mostly from the voluntary donations of the people who are members.  Sometimes it seems like a miracle that we are able to make the budget. 

Of course, some churches fall short of "making the budget" and then there are staff cuts and ministers who have to work half time.  I am grateful that I never went through any of that.   As I look back, it is easy to remember the stresses of being a pastor - the challenge of evangelism and stewardship and sometimes difficult people.  The weekly sermon preparation that was relentless.

When I attend First Church, however, I am grateful for the blessings of being part of a church.  It really is - or can be - the body of Christ.  One of my favorite hymns is - "The Church's One Foundation."  There is a line in it that can bring me to tears - "mystic sweet communion."  Richard Rohr has written that religion is about communion and I do experience that.  There are times when the music, the message, the people, the place can remind me that I am part of something bigger than me.  We are together in following Jesus and responsible for and to each other.  It is a feeling that comes and goes as we do the "work" of the church - giving, serving, greeting, meeting and caring for each other.  

I know that many people have had negative experiences in churches.  Richard Rohr writes "religion either produces the very best people or the very worst."  I have experienced both.   He also writes:

“A mature Christian sees Christ in everything and everyone else. That is a definition that will never fail you, always demand more of you, and give you no reasons to fight, exclude, or reject anyone.”

I choose to continue to find comfort, growth , and hope through being part of a church. 

Saturday, January 27, 2024

Justice and Mercy

This week John and I have participated in both justice and mercy ministries.  Some years ago, I learned the difference between them and it was a helpful distinction.

Last night we helped to serve a meal at Faith Mission.  We have a team at our church that provides a meal there once a month.  There were people who spent a couple of hours in the kitchen Friday afternoon preparing beef tips in gravy, noodles, green beans and salad to provide dinner (along with with rolls and a cookie) for the people who are staying at the Faith Mission.  We arrived at 4:30 and put on our aprons, hair nets, and gloves to serve the meal from 5 to 6:30.  We served about seventy five -  mostly men.  

I had participated years ago in "Martha's Kitchen" when I lived in Bowling Green.  It was a similar experience except that in a small town you got to know the "regulars" who came to eat.  We would sometimes visit with them and also provide food to go and other needs.  Here, our interaction with the diners was pretty limited.  We said - Hello or Have a cookie and they said thank you and God bless. (and two people adamantly refused the salad and green beans.)  There was a person who did security and it was clear that there were protocols in place.  So, we drove down from our comfortable home in Galena to do this small offering to people who are clearly living hard lives.  This is a picture of "mercy" ministries that churches do.  It is providing needed help in the present moment.

Monday night we attended a BREAD meeting at our church.  BREAD is a justice organization in Columbus comprised of about 50 faith organizations. Every year each church discerns what issues "keep us up at night" and come together to decide on one focus for the year.  This year it is looking at the problem of affordable housing.  We learned about the research committee that will be working on that as well as dates for upcoming meetings - most especially the Nehemiah Action Meeting in June.  That is when we will come together - hopefully 200 from our church -  to join hopefully 4000 people from the community to confront the community leaders that have the power to make something happen.  It was, for me, an inspiring meeting and at the same time I see how slow the process is to make any kind of systemic change.

As I look over this blog, I am aware of how often I struggle with the basic inequities and unfairness of life. I was  been blessed to be born into a middle class home in America with college educated parents who loved me.  Just that gave me a head start on life that many people do not have.  As a follower of Jesus Christ, I know that we are all loved by God and called into relationship with God and each other.  We are responsible to and for each other.  So, then always the question is - what can I do?  What can we do?

As a pastor, I felt like I was living "in the arena" and had  some opportunities to "make a difference."  Now, as a retiree I wonder.  I always wonder.  This serving a meal on a Friday night seems like a pittance and the justice ministry is a slow moving slog.  And yet, I know that you have to start somewhere.  At the very least, it forces me to think beyond my own comfort and problems and consider the needs of people who have not have the advantages that I have had.  I struggle.  I question everything.  And I pray.

Here is a prayer by Maxine Shonk

May the God of JUSTICE bless you.

May you embrace what is true in your life and speak with an undivided heart

for the cause of what is right and good on the earth.

May you know the mind of God in all your decisions and the hand of God in all your undertakings.

May the God of JUSTICE  be with you.

Amen

Monday, January 22, 2024

Drop your nets


Yesterday I preached at Westminster Thurber Retirement Community.  They are without a chaplain right now and Larry, who teaches the Bible study with me, asked me to help out.  I had previously preached there in November.  I preached twice - at 2:30 for the people in the care center and at 3:30 for the general community.

The lectionary text was Mark 1: 14-20 and the calling of the disciples.  I used a sermon that I had used in the past, but tailored it to this community and find I am thinking about it still.  When Jesus called the fishermen to "follow me" they "dropped their nets" and went with him.  Their nets represented their identity, their living, their security.  

I talked about how, as seniors, we have all dropped a lot of nets along the way.  We have retired which is challenging because so often that has been our identity and our purpose.  And the people who live in a retirement community, like me at this point in my life, have also sold their homes and given away a lot of "stuff" that had memories and meaning in order to live somewhere new.  As I pondered the text, I knew that that is hardly the end of dropping nets.

I found myself thinking about Erik Erikson's stages of psychosocial development with Generativity verses Stagnation being one we go through.  When we are generative we are making commitments to other people, mentoring, caring for the next generation.  Stagnation is placing self concern above all else and not being involved with others or the world.  It really is getting stuck.   What I know is that it is easy to get comfortable with the status quo and not try any new things.  Keep reading the same kind of books, being with the same kind of people, doing what I always do.  (Yes!  I am always preaching to myself.)

My life with John has led me into new interests - like football of all things.  I can't believe that this year i will actually know and care who is going to be in the Super Bowl.  But I know that more is coming and more is needed in terms of my being "generative" or really, fully alive.  Dropping the nets is the beginning, but the next thing needs to be taking a risk and being open  - not just to the next interest - but the next opportunity to serve others and essentially follow Jesus. 

It is easy to preach it - now I need to do it.

Saturday, January 20, 2024

Returning from a Retreat

I went to Hocking Hills and stayed at a beautiful house with the women of my peer group for a retreat.  It was so helpful for me to have time away for reflection, sharing and just being with others.  I did several reiki treatments and the whole experience felt like it grounded me.  I recommend that to anyone.

One person shared this reading from the book:  The Wisdom of the Enneagram.  It really spoke to me.




The Stages of the Work

 
If we were to really observe ourselves,
we would become aware of our habits.

If we were to become aware of our habits,
we would let go and relax.

If we were to let go and relax,
we would be aware of sensations.

If we were to be aware of sensations,
we would receive impressions.

If we were to receive impressions,
we would awaken to the moment.

If we were to awaken to the moment,
we would experience reality.

If we were to experience reality,
we would see that we are not our personality.

If we were to see that we are not our personality,
we would remember ourselves.

If we were to remember ourselves,
we would let go of our fear and attachments.

If we were to let go of our fear and attachments,
we would be touched by God.

If we were touched by God,
we would seek union with God.

If we were to seek union with God,
we would will what God wills.

If we were to will what God wills,
we would be transformed.

If we were transformed,
the world would be transformed.

If the world were transformed,
all would return to God.

–from The Wisdom of the Enneagram
Don Richard Riso & Russ Hudson

Wednesday, January 17, 2024

Life on Hoover

It is eleven degrees right now and I just went outside to take some pictures of Hoover Reservoir.  It is frozen, I think and there is a little snow on it.  The wind has made designs on the surface and I marvel at the beauty that we can find even on a cold January morning.

I am aware of the privilege of living here in a warm home with a stocked pantry.  There are people right now who are freezing and homeless here in Columbus.  And I really have more than I need.

And outside of Columbus - in this beautiful world which God created - there are wars in Ukraine and Gaza and hostages who have been held now for months.  There are people who continue to travels hundreds of miles to enter this country for refuge and create another seemingly impossible situation at the border in caring for them.  

So I looked for a poem by Mary Oliver that would put into words the "Both And" that we live with - our abundance in the face of other's scarcity and our freedom while others are oppressed and our peace while too many live in conflict.  I found this quote:

 What we must do, I suppose, is to hope the world keeps its balance; what we are to do, however, with our hearts waiting and watching-truly I do not know.

 

To be alive is to see it all - the good and the bad, the beauty and the ugliness and not loose hope.  To trust that in the midst of everything - God is here working in the margins and helping each of us to see the beauty of our lives and to do what we are called to do to help bring healing and peace.   

For now, my heart is waiting and watching.


Monday, January 15, 2024

Howard Thurman

Yesterday in church Tim Ahrens shared a reading by Howard Thurman.  It really spoke to me.  I did some digging on the computer and found another meaningful writing by him.  I share them both here.


How Good to Center Down! By Howard Thurman

 

How good it is to center down!

To sit quietly and see one’s self pass by!

The streets of our minds seethe with endless traffic;

Our spirits resound with clashing, with noisy silences,

While something deep within hungers and thirsts for the still moment and the resting lull.

With full intensity we seek, ere thicket passes, a fresh sense of order in our living;

A direction, a strong sure purpose that will structure our confusion and bring meaning in our chaos.

We look at ourselves in this waiting moment—the kinds of people we are.

The questions persist: what are we doing with our lives?—what are the motives that order our days?

What is the end of our doings? Where are we trying to go? Where do we put the emphasis and where are our values focused? For what end do we make sacrifices?

Where is my treasure and what do I love most in life?

What do I hate most in life and to what am I true? Over and over the questions beat upon the waiting moment.

As we listen, floating up through all of the jangling echoes of our turbulence, there is a sound of another kind—

A deeper note which only the stillness of the heart makes clear.

It moves directly to the core of our being. Our questions are answered,

Our spirits refreshed, and we move back into the traffic of our daily round

With the peace of the Eternal in our step.

How good it is to center down!

 

An Inward Sea by Howard Thurman

There is in every person an inward sea,

and in that sea there is an island

and on that island there is an altar

and standing guard before that altar is the ”angel with the flaming sword.”

Nothing can get by that angel to be placed upon that altar unless it has the mark of your inner authority.

Nothing passes ”the angel with the flaming sword” to be placed upon your altar unless it be a part of ”the fluid area of your consent.”

This is your crucial link with the Eternal.