Yesterday afternoon I received a call from Audrey who I thought was doing some more work on the floors on her new house. "Mom! There was a fire at my house! I'm still shaking. Come here!"
A little sputtering on my part and it sunk in. A fire? How? What?
She was planning to move into this cute red brick house this weekend. She had sanded the floor s and now was in the process of staining them. She had taken a three day break to run in a 3 day relay marathon and came back to work on the house on Sunday. . She was making plans to pick up furniture this weekend. She was very ready to leave us and we were ready to be back to just the two of us. We were in the countdown to her moving out and starting her new life in this sweet little house.
The questions were answered when I got there. Approaching the house, it was clear something bad had happened. There were black spots on the front door and a hole at the top of it. The eave on the attic was damaged where firefighters had entered.
I could not get in the front door and walked around the back.
Inside was devastating. The ceiling and floors of the living and dining area were dark, the walls were blistered, the windows cracked, the smell of smoke pungent. I walked in and was speechless. Seeing blinds and a lampshade that had melted in the heat. The closet door was gone and the bottom of plastic garbage was mute witness to the heat of the explosion.
We walked quietly from room to room noting that two bedrooms were untouched and one had black smudges on some of the walls. The microwave was damaged, the celebratory wine in the refrigerator was still there. It was awful. Marnie and Erik came over and we all tried to imagine what happened last Friday morning and what was going to happen now?
That was yesterday.
It is Monday afternoon - I have had a nap and Audrey has spoken to the insurance company, and the fire marshall. More is known. The insurance company is sending their own investigator. She will hire a contractor who will work with her and the company and it will probably take from 4 to 6 months before she can move in. That much we know.
As the information comes in and time elapses the sense of anxiety has slowly lessened. The reality of the next few weeks and months is settling in. And we will go forward.
There have been many many conversations of what could have been - she could have been present, she could have moved in furniture and clothing , she could have had a pet. In other words - it could have been worse. At the same time we wonder about what the house will look like after the work is done - new walls? kitchen? wiring? who knows the improvements that might happen int his 50 year old house because of the fire?
Now we live into the reality that Audrey is still living with me and Chuck and finding the best parts of that. I am watching mostly on the sidelines as she puts one foot in front of the other and makes one phone call after another and does what needs to be done.. I am proud of all my daughters successes, but these moments of watching resilience in the face of deep disappointment and grief are remarkable. As I watched Marnie bounce back from a job loss and Kacey from the repercussions of a teacher's strike, now I see Audrey's grit and grace in a very trying time.
My faith is strong and I know - because I have seen it over and over again through the years - that ultimately all will be well.
I think it will be good to end this post with a prayer.for hope by Martin Luther King, Jr
And now unto him who is able to keep us from falling
and lift us from the dark valley of despair
to the bright mountain of hope,
from the midnight of desperation to the daybreak of joy,
to him be power and authority, for ever and ever.
Amen
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