I was so happy to get to the see the documentary - "Joan Ricers - A Piece of Work" last night.
I picked Susan up at work and we went to a little French bistro before the movie. Interestingly, in our conversation before the movie she was talking about writing and how much she enjoyed writing. Susan is now the editor of the Home and Fashiion section of the Arizona Republic and she is, I am sure, a good one. But she is in her heart a writer - that is what gives her life.
Watching Joan Rivers is seeing a 75 year old woman who knows that working is what gives her life. At the very beginning of the documentary - which is about a year in her life - she makes it clear that she does not want an empty calendar. She loves to work. And the stand up as really a form of acting in the role of "Joan Rivers" - a persona that is different from the person who is joan Rivers. The most compelling part of the movie for me was the question of passion versus compulsion. is it a passion that makes her want to work or is it a compulsion that fills the empty part of herself. And it is probably both.
All of this makes me ruminate on work and the passion that drives me to work and the lines between work and compulsion. What I know is that I have a passion to create places and times for people to experience God. I cannot control the experience - but I really love the process - of Bible Study, retreats and Sunday worship. I think about it all the time (except right now!) and love it all. This morning - Friday - I woke up and thought that usually on Friday mornings I am puzzling out the sermon organization in the early mornings before rising. That has been a pattern for years. Passion? Compulsion? Probably both.
So it seems to me we often live in this tension. It is so important to have something in our life that gives us life - writing, stand up, ministry, teaching, parenting, etc. We are blessed if we have found that passion that gives us life. At the same time - there is always the question of whether that passion has gone over into becoming a compulsion - that takes away from the rest of our life.
I feel blessed to have this time for reflection on my life and the blessings and the challenges.
It all feels good.