New begnnings

 Which involves a new church for me - Gender Road Christian Church.  I will be working there part time for a while.  They have had two disappointing tries at securing an associate and I am going to help out the senior pastor for awhile as they regroup and eventually try again.

I went to church on Sunday and discovered that I am listed on the bulletin as the "Minister of Engagement" which I kind of like.  I am going to be working 10 hours a week and preaching once a month.  I am also going to start a six week "Grief Group" - actually two - that meet bi weekly with one in the afternoon and one in the evening.  And after that, we will see how I will serve the church. 
I am both excited and anxious about this new call for a season.

What I keep learning is that everything I do is essentially "for a season" so that there are always beginnings and endings.  Another beginning for me is to live into my new role as Supervisor in the Wellstreams program.  In two weeks I will meet with the woman who I will be supervising.  She is learning how to be a spiritual director and I will be supporting her for the next two years.  It is both daunting and exciting for me to consider my role in her spiritual journey.  I look forward to this new relationship and this new season for me.

Last weekend I taught two boundary training workshops in Akron for a total of 26 people.  When I do boundary training I am always very aware of the ways I have crossed boundaries over the years in my ministry and if I had known then what I know now  I would have made some different decisions in the daily life of my time as pastor.  But I think it was Maya Angelou who said - "When you know better, you do better."  And that in essence means that life is optimally a continual time of new beginnings.  Because  - looking back - there are so many times I have not known what exactly I was doing.  Anxiety, self centeredness, blind spots, and ignorance can lead to all kinds of boundary violations.   But learning means new behavior and new attitudes and doing better.  A new beginning.

So, here I am starting over again - with a new church to serve and new ways to be a spiritual guide. 
And always aware of the grief I carry for the loss of Chuck and the mistakes of the past.
May I be open to God's leading and trust that all will be well.
Here's a blessing by Maxine Shonk

May the God of BEGINNING AGAIN be with you.
May that God hold you near as you grieve what is past and move with faith into what is to be.
May the hand of God carry you across the darkness of loss into light.
May your courage and your trust become for those around you a living witness to the mystery of death and rising.
May the God of BEGINNING AGAIN bless you.