Merry Christmas

It was a very different Christmas for me this year.  I am not working at a church for one thing.  I have had time to savor the holiday and reflect on its meaning for me this year.

As always, family is important. Saturday 17 of us spent time at Kacey's house exchanging presents, eating Christmas food and playing games.  It was lots of fun.  This was John's first experience with this large family and he loved it.  As I write this, I am preparing to leave to go to Lisa's house for their Christmas celebration.  I will be bringing John  to meet Chuck's family. I know he will be welcomed as this new chapter in our lives begins.

Church has always been central to this holiday for me.  Because we are now part of First Congregational, we took a name off the angel tree and bought gifts for a little girl, Maya.  We also provided home made Christmas cookies to be served at "Bethlehem on Broadway."  This was nice, but very removed from real interaction  Because of the weather, we did not attend either Christmas Eve or Christmas day services. So my Christmas experience was very different from past years when I was front and center in the services and engaged with many people over the season.  Christmas can be both a joyous and a sad time of the year and when you are the pastor, you are walking with others through it all.

Mostly, this has been a time of wonder for me.  I sit in a  home that is mostly windows  and look at the stark beauty of the bare trees and ever changing Hoover Reservoir and savor the gifts of my life in this moment.  Some of this may be the movement from being a human "doing" to a human "being." I am grateful and trying - always trying - to live in THIS moment..  

The images of Christmas live in my heart.  Christmas morning I read to John from Richard Rohr's writing

For Christians who have gone to their own depths, there is the uncovering of an indwelling Presence—a deep, loving “yes” inherent within us. In Christian theology, this inner Presence would be described as the Holy Spirit, which is precisely God as immanent, within, and even our deepest, truest self. God is the very ground of our Being.

Some mystics have described this Presence as “closer to me than I am to myself” or “more me than I am myself.” Many of us would also describe this, as Thomas Merton did, as the True Self. Yet it still must be awakened and chosen. The Holy Spirit is totally given and given equally to all, but must be consciously received, too. The Presence needs to be recognized, honored, and drawn upon to become a living Presence within us.

He is Immanuel - God with us.  Even though Jesus was born in the midst of darkness - the corrupt and power hungry Herod, for example - God was with him and protected him.  God is here with me guiding me and strengthening me as I enter into this new chapter of my life. 

My prayer for this Christmas season is a continuing YES from me to the one who gives me life.  May God guide me into whatever is the new places of serving and living as a follower of Jesus. May I know myself as beloved and love others as Jesus would have me. 

Amen.

PS - quote from Henri Nouwen

We are the Beloved. We are intimately loved long before our parents, teachers, spouses, children and friends loved or wounded us. That’s the truth of our lives. That’s the truth I want you to claim for yourself. That’s the truth spoken by the voice that says, “You are my Beloved” [see Mark 1:9–11].

Listening to that voice with great inner attentiveness, I hear at my center words that say: “I have called you by name, from the very beginning. You are mine and I am yours. You are my Beloved, on you my favor rests. I have molded you in the depths of the earth and knitted you together in your mother’s womb. I have carved you in the palms of my hands and hidden you in the shadow of my embrace. I look at you with infinite tenderness and care for you with a care more intimate than that of a mother for her child. I have counted every hair on your head and guided you at every step. Wherever you go, I go with you, and wherever you rest, I keep watch. I will give you food that will satisfy all your hunger and drink that will quench all your thirst. I will not hide my face from you. You know me as your own as I know you as my own. You belong to me. I am your father, your mother, your brother, your sister, your lover and your spouse . . . yes, even your child . . . wherever you are I will be. Nothing will ever separate us. We are one.” [2]