God is Not Done

With me. With us.  With God's creation

I ponder that this morning as I read today's scriptures and Richard Rohr's meditation and reflect on my life.

God is never done with me, with us, with God's creation.

The scriptures today include the story of Sarai, Abram and Hagar.  The first thing I noticed was the names - not Sarah and Abraham - but Sarai and Abram.  They are still just in the begining part of this journey.  They hear the promise of God's blessing - glorious impossible promise of a baby - and don't quite trust it.  They manage and maneuver on their own to make something happen now.  So, Sarai brings her handmaiden Hagar to Abram and he impregnates her.  And this brings out the worst in everyone - Abraham seems weak and deflecting responsibility, Hagar becomes taunting and cruel, Sarai is vindictive and cruel.

The accompanying scripture from Romans makes clear that this is not a story about the people - but about God and God's trustworthiness.  Hagar is banished and yet protected by God and her son Ishmael is the forefather of the Muslim religion.  Sarai does conceive and her child carries the promise of the Judeo Christian religion.

In Romans Paul writes (Romans 4: 1-12 - the Message)  "Abraham is father of all people who embrace what God does for them while they are still on the "outs."  "  He is "willing to live in the risky faith embrace."

I love this picture of Abram and Sarai because I - like them at times - trust but don't trust in God's work in my life.  There are times when I am waiting, waiting, waiting that I try to make something happen on my own.  And yet God is ultimately faithful.  God is never done with me, with us, with God's creation.

We have an ever creating God in an evercreating universe.  Richard Rohr writes:"Creativity itself is what is evolving in the cosmos, and we are the growing edge..."  He writes this has 2 effects
1. it makes the whole thing intensely meaningful.
2. we bear some responsibility.  we have to take part in the work.

And so today  - even though I see the pain and suffering and evil that is present in our world - I remember that God is not done.  I am called to bring light, hope, healing and love in my small way to my little corner of the world.  And trust. as I enter into that risky faith embrace.

PS - as addendum to this:  an hour after I wrote this, I went to Reagan's high school to drop off some clothes she needed.  As I stood outside the school waiting to be buzzed in - I watched them go on lockdown.  There is a juvenile with a gun in the area.  There are so many ways that we can feel like we are in the dark .......

Sitting with all of it

Today is the second day of Lent and I sit with all of it:
 - the blessings and the curses
 - the hope and the despair
 - the life and the death
 - the goodness and the corruption
 - the joy and the sorrow

I sit with the horror of another mass shooting, another school shooting.
I listened this morning to a reporter asking the school superintendent how he was going to lead through the coming days of 17 funerals and it just makes me weep.  I cannot imagine the long term effects of this shooting in the lives of the student,s teachers, parent, community.

And I ponder again the mystery of mental illness and the terrible isolation of so many lives.

I consider again this often violent, sexualized, dehumanizing culture that we live in and then I think about the frustrating, confounding topic of gun control.  I keep learning about the hold that the NRA has on the law makers who could make some changes in background checks and the availability of assault rifles.  And I think surely something can be done.  Surely.

And then I come back to the peace of my life.  I grieve at a distance and feel frustrated, powerless and angry.

This morning I read the daily scriptures and was struck by these verses from 1 John

 This is the message we have heard from him and proclaim to you, that God is light and in him there is no darkness at all.
 If we say that we have fellowship with him while we are walking in darkness, we lie and do not do what is true; but if we walk in the light as he himself is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus his Son cleanses us from all sin. 
If we say that we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us. 
If we confess our sins, he who is faithful and just will forgive us our sins and cleanse us from all unrighteousness. If we say that we have not sinned, we make him a liar, and his word is not in us.

And so I confess today - that I have often see evil and accepted it as I live in my own bubble and tell myself there is nothing I can do.
I confess today my indifference, complacency and sloth.

And will take a step today into action - not just thoughts, prayers and facebook posts.  Letters will be written and my congress people will be urged to do something to bring change.  And I am open to other actions that will be revealed to me in this journey.

This seems like a good step during Lent

Ash Wednesday

I am sitting in a beauty salon with my hair full of dye and it is " processing" and so am I.  Processing the beginning of this holy season of preparation.

The processing on my hair will take 45 minutes and the processing of my life's journey and purpose is truly eternal.

I got an email from Susan suggesting we blog together for the next 40 days and I am definitely interested. Interested in what will transpire. In how God is working in my life still. The processing is never never over.

I began this day with the scriptures in the daily lectionary. Most are very familiar: create in me a new heart" and pray in private, etc. what struck me this morning was this verse from Isaiah:
If you remove the yoke from among you,
 the pointing of the finger, the speaking of evil,
if you offer your food to the hungry
 and satisfy the needs of the afflicted,
then your light shall rise in the darkness
 and your gloom be like the noonday

There is a yoke that i am so used to that I don't even recognize it at times: the yoke of judgment, evaluation, criticism. Pointing fingers" it causes so much heaviness between people, it sullied my soul, it leads to depression and inner and outer conflict.

As I read these texts today, I was struck by the descriptions of God in Joel:
Return to the Lord, your God,
 for he is gracious and merciful,
slow to anger, and abounding in steadfast love,
 and relents from punishing


So maybe as I begin Lent , as I tonight receive the ashes on my forehead, my first practice might be to remove the yolk of finger pointing and receive and try to model the grace, mercy, and steadfast love of God.

That might be a very good first step